


A Panacea [for the absent soul.]

by WhiteDalvaria



Category: Rooster Teeth/Achievement Hunter RPF
Genre: Angst, Domestic Violence, Fuck Travis, Graphic Violence, I'll be glad when I don't have to write that prick anymore tbh, Just tagging heavily to be safe, M/M, Past Abuse, Past Domestic Violence, Poor Jerem, Stolen from my tumblr
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-08-31
Updated: 2018-09-09
Packaged: 2019-07-04 23:09:45
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 4
Words: 3,753
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15851331
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/WhiteDalvaria/pseuds/WhiteDalvaria
Summary: From tumblr: The five guys are in an established relationship and they really like Jeremy who’s been working with them for over a year but who’s already in a relationship. They find out J’s partner is an asshole and help him leave relationship, but he’s been in such a shitty relationship for so long the other guys have to show him how he should be treated.





	1. Chapter 1

_It wasn’t that bad._

_It wasn’t_ that _bad._

_It wasn’t-_

Jeremy repeated the mantra repeatedly, trying to convince himself of something other than the truth. But, as he found himself at a loss for words once again, it was becoming harder to do so.

He loved Travis, or at least, he did at one point. When they first met, it had practically been love at first sight. Travis had won him over with a charming smile and loving words that had wrapped around each of his heartstrings. It started by exchanging phone numbers and grew into a first date. The first date morphed into a second, and then a third, before Jeremy blatantly stated that he was in love.

Jeremy really hoped that Travis would feel the same. The butterflies that filled his stomach whenever Travis smiled, how Travis’ words were like music to his ears… It was too much to handle. And after Travis admitted that he returned the feelings, Jeremy felt like he was walking on air.

From there, Jeremy found himself on a staircase, and each day, he was slowly making it to the bottom. For the first month, nothing changed. Travis was still loving and kind, and Jeremy was still smitten. And then, one day, Travis yelled at him for the first time. Jeremy couldn’t remember what for, but after he had apologized profusely for whatever he had done wrong, a pit started to grow in his stomach. Somehow, he knew things were just going to get worse. He just refused to admit it.

Their first fight had been forever engraved in Jeremy’s brain. After a particularly late night at the office, he had come home to an angry boyfriend, demanding why he hadn’t called. Even after explaining that he couldn’t call in the middle of a livestream, Travis refused to listen. The enraged male had screamed every profanity he could think of at the short male, and Jeremy just absorbed it like a sponge. Nodded at him whenever he was insulted. Though the gesture was meant as one of agreement, Travis had taken it as mockery, and his reaction was to throw his water glass – which had been resting on the coffee table beside him – at the wall right beside Jeremy’s head. Though the glass did not hit him, the shock was real. The man who had proclaimed his love for him, who had said he’d do anything to protect him, had just gotten physically aggressive.

Jeremy choked back a sob when the realization hit; he couldn’t stay. But as he turned away and grabbed the doorknob, a hand fell to his shoulder. It wasn’t with the aggression that had been portrayed moments ago, but soft and tender, like the Travis he fell in love with. Before Jeremy even turned back around, apologies had spilled from his mouth like a waterfall. Murmurs of “I’m so sorry”, “Don’t leave me”, and “I’ll never do it again, I promise” had crashed into Jeremy like a tidal wave. Could Travis’ word be trusted? Even though the red flag had been put on full display, Jeremy went against his better judgement and accepted the apology.

For a fleeting period after the blowup, things had gone back to normal. Travis was showering him in love and affection, and Jeremy felt as if he was on cloud nine. Soon enough, however, he found himself back where he started, and felt trapped.

Jeremy should have known better than to believe that things would change.

–

“How much longer do you think we’ll be?” Jeremy asked suddenly, in the middle of a recording. “I should probably let Trav know.”

Geoff shrugged from his desk. “Maybe another hour? I’m sure he’ll understand if you tell him it’s just work.”

The short male absentmindedly nodded, shooting Travis a text with the estimated time. “I don’t know, Geoff. I think he’s feeling a little left out lately.”

“Aww, is he getting jealous?” Gavin joked. “He’ll be fine. It’s not like he doesn’t work late sometimes.”

“I know.” Jeremy glanced away from his screen to look at his phone, and frowned.

_From: Trav_

_There’s no fucking way you’re still working. It’s almost six PM. Get home. Now._

Ryan was the first to notice his change in expression. “Is everything okay, Lil J?”

“Yeah, it’s fine.” Jeremy knew Ryan could see through the lie. “He just had a rough day and misses me.” He set his phone down without replying and went back to the game. “But you’d better pay attention or I’m gonna fuck you up.”

After forty-five minutes, Jack had won the Let’s Play, and the AH crew was finally packing up and getting ready to leave. It was then that Jeremy decided to pick up his phone, and internally grimaced when he saw the screen.

_From: Trav_

_Are you on your way, Jer?_

_(5:50) Missed call from Trav_

_From: Trav_

_Jeremy, you’d better fucking answer me in the next five seconds or so help me_

_From: Trav_

_I swear to fucking god Jeremy, I will end you._

_(6:05) Missed call from Trav_

_From: Trav_

_Pick up the fucking phone._

_(6:07) Missed call from Trav_

_(6:10) Missed call from Trav_

_(6:12) Missed call from Trav_

_(6:18) Missed call from Trav_

_From: Trav_

_You’re toast._

_(6:25) Missed call from Trav_

_From: Trav_

_Just wait until you get home, Jeremy._

_(6:27) Missed call from Trav_

_(6:30) Missed call from Trav_

_From: Trav_

_YOU’RE FUCKING DEAD._

Jeremy felt the blood in his veins turn to ice as he rushed out the door, ignoring the concerned calls from the office. He needed to get home. If Travis came after him, he’d be in more trouble than he could imagine.

What had he done?


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is the last chapter I have pre-written; anything else will be fresh off the press. <3
> 
> Warning: Escalated domestic violence ahead.

The fact that the entire apartment was dark when Jeremy got home should have been the first sign.

Initially, upon pulling into the driveway, he had guessed that Travis had left for a while. But the other male’s car was still parked in the driveway, and there was nowhere super close to their shared abode that Travis would bother walking to.

The silence as he warily opened the front door should have been the second.

Even as Jeremy turned the lights on, everything was strangely in order. Nothing was out of place, everything was quiet… Perhaps Travis had gone to bed, or had seen how ridiculous he was being earlier.

Getting even slightly relaxed had been his biggest mistake.

“Jeremy, what the fuck took you so long?”

Jeremy’s heart nearly burst from his chest as Travis entered the room. Immediately, he noticed that Travis’ eyes were bloodshot, hair disheveled, and his speech was slightly slurred, indicating that he’d been drinking. “T-Trav, I was work-”

“ _I was working_ ,” Travis mocked. “Nice excuse, but that won’t fly with me.” With a few angry strides, the taller male was stood in front of Jeremy. “What were you really doing?”

“I really  _was_  just working, I swear.” Jeremy wanted to move, but he felt frozen. “Trav, why would I lie-”

“You were fucking around with the rest of those Achievement Hunter sluts, weren’t you?!” Travis grabbed a fistful of Jeremy’s hair and forced him to look up at him. “Can’t keep your hands off ‘em, can you?!”

Jeremy tried to shake his head, but Travis’ hold kept him firmly in place. “I-I would n-never d-do that t-t-to you!”

With an angry yell, Travis threw Jeremy into the coffee table, his body twisting as a barely audible crack filled the air. “I see the way you look at them, Jeremy! I see you lusting over them!” He knelt to the floor as Jeremy rolled off the table, gasping for breath. “Why do you make me do this, Jeremy? I’ve done nothing but love you!”

“I haven’t fucking done-” Jeremy gasped in pain as Travis kicked him in the stomach, effectively interrupting him.

“I didn’t give you permission to speak to me that way, you piece of shit!”

Winded, Jeremy mustered his strength to get into a sitting position. “G-go to hell.”

“And what would you do without me, Jeremy?” Travis grabbed the front of Jeremy’s shirt and lifted him off the ground. “No one else could fucking love you. You’re nothing without me, Jeremy. Nothing!”

The short male went to retort, but was silenced with a punch to the face. It took all his willpower not to tear up. Not in front of Travis.

“You should be ashamed of yourself, you filthy whore. You’re lucky I don’t kill you for what you’ve done to me.” Travis dropped Jeremy from his hold, the smaller of the two landing on the floor with a dull thud. “Sleep out here tonight. I don’t want to be seen with you.”

Jeremy laid where he landed, his body throbbing in pain. He listened as Travis’ footsteps got quieter, until he heard the door to the bedroom close forcefully. Only when silence once again filled the apartment did he allow the tears he’d fought to hold back flow loose.

_I didn’t do anything wrong._

_Did I do something wrong?_

_I must’ve done something wrong._

_I’m worthless._

The thoughts swirled around in his head, torturing his soul. He let out a choked sob and curled into a ball, ignoring the sharp pain radiating through his ribcage.  _Travis was right. I am a piece of shit…_  Jeremy didn’t bother moving from the floor, and let his eyes slip closed.  _I deserved this… I’m so sorry, Travis… For whatever I’ve done._  Soon enough, his thoughts finally dissipated, and he finally settled into an uneasy sleep.

–

“Don’t let them see that bruise on your face.” Travis’ stare was emotionless. “Cover it up.”

“I-I can’t…”

Slap! “Find a way, Jeremy!”

Jeremy nursed his already-injured cheek. “I’ll just… tell them I fell down the stairs or something.”

“You’d better.” The taller male turned and walked towards the door. “I expect you home on time tonight, understand?”

“…yes.”

“Good.” Without another word, Travis shut the front door.

Once he heard Travis’ car pull away, Jeremy slowly made his way into the bathroom. After removing his shirt, he gasped at the deep purple that had begun to form on his abdomen and ribcage. Though it would be hard to hide the pain from the guys, at least he could cover those. But the bruise on his cheek was angry and near swollen, and that one would be harder to explain. He shook his head; the guys could  _not_ know what happened. Even if he had deserved it.

Getting ready had proved difficult, as moving a certain way caused his pain to skyrocket, but soon enough, he was dressed and on his way to the Achievement Hunter office. Jeremy rehearsed a few excuses in his head, finally deciding on one, as he entered the building. Luckily, only a few people were there, and they hadn’t noticed them.

Jeremy had only been in the office for a few minutes before he heard Michael and Lindsay come in. He flopped his hood up and turned away, hoping that he wouldn’t be noticed right away.

“Morning, Lil’ J,” came Michael’s tired voice only moments later.

“Mornin’.” The exchange ended there, and Jeremy only hoped he would get as lucky as the others arrived.

His luck stayed until Geoff walked in.

“Hey Jer- What the fuck happened to your face?”

The slightly harsher tone Geoff’s voice had taken caused him to wince, which luckily went unnoticed by Geoff. “Oh, I just pulled a Gavin. Tripped on my way in last night and smashed my face on the door.”

Geoff raised an eyebrow, clearly not buying it, but unsure of how to proceed. “Uh huh. Well, are you okay?”

“Yeah, I’m fine.” Jeremy feigned a smile. “It hurt a bit last night, but it’s not too bad today. I hardly even notice it.”

When Jeremy lowered his hood, he heard a hiss from Michael. “Dude, that looks bad. Do you need some ice or something?”

“No, I said I’m good.” Jeremy tried to keep himself from sounding irate; he knew they were only worried about him. But he deserved what he got, and they didn’t need to get involved.

“Just… let me know if I can help you with anything.” With a pat to his shoulder, Geoff walked over to his desk.

The short male nodded. “Will do, Geoff.”

–

Most of the day had passed without further mention of the anomaly on his face, though he knew Geoff was still suspicious. He hadn’t lied when he said his face wasn’t bothering him anymore, but the dull throbbing of his ribcage had become constant, and it was getting harder to keep from showing it.

Somehow, he managed to keep his increased level of pain from the guys, laughing along at jokes and jerking around as he usually did. But by three PM, he knew he had to do something, or he’d be found out.

“Hey, Geoff?” he inquired.

The tattooed male didn’t even look up from his computer screen. “What’s up?”

“We have any Tylenol? Headache.”

Geoff nodded. “I know Lindsay carries some. You should ask her.” He glanced up at Jeremy. “You sure that’s all?”

“Yeah, Geoff. I’m sure.” To avoid more questioning, Jeremy rose quickly, and instantly regretted his decision. His pain escalated from a seven to a solid ten, and he let out an involuntary gasp.

“Jeremy?” The older male rose, slowly walking near his employee. “What’s wrong?”

Jeremy only let out a whine as he tried to straighten himself out. He didn’t count on a sharp, stabbing pain in his chest, and he let out a yell as he collapsed to the floor.

He could see all sorts of activity around him now, but he heard nothing. All he could hear were his rapid heartbeats and rough, jagged breaths. He felt a hand on his shoulder that was accompanied by muffled yelling. The pain was too much for Jeremy to continue to bear, and he let his eyes slip closed.

Suddenly, the pain was gone.


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I feel this wasn't worth the wait, but I hope y'all like it. Only one more chapter after this one.

Jeremy was confused when he came to. He was no longer in the office, where he last remembered being, but instead surrounded by too-white walls. He went to shift so he could look around, but a flare of pain caused him to gasp and still.

“Hey, don’t move.” Shifting his eyes to the source of the voice, Jeremy located Geoff. “You’ve got some pretty serious injuries.”

The shorter male froze. Geoff _saw_ what happened? What would Travis say? Jeremy didn’t notice when his breath hitched in his throat, and his heartbeat sped up. Travis would kill him. He promised not to let the guys find out and they-

“-remy, hey, Jeremy. Just breathe.”

As Geoff’s voice came into focus, Jeremy felt a burning sensation in his chest. As Geoff’s pleas for Jeremy to breathe broke through, he realized that he’d been exhaling, but inhaling very little. He tried to take a breath, but instantly felt the air leave him, as if he’d been sucker punched.

“You’re doing great, Lil J. Breathe with me, okay?”

Jeremy raised his gaze to focus on Geoff, his pale blue eyes calm in comparison to everything he was feeling. It took a few tries – exhaling too soon was a problem – but Jeremy soon felt his breathing regulate, and his heart rate go down. Only after he’d calmed did he notice his cheeks were wet. He’d cried in front of Geoff.

“Sorry” was all he managed to mutter, once again avoiding Geoff’s gaze. What would Geoff say, knowing Jeremy lied to him? To everyone?

But Geoff showed no anger. Instead, he put a gentle hand on Jeremy’s shoulder. “Just… What happened, Jeremy?”

Jeremy felt panic bubble up again but took a deep breath to combat it. “I… I can’t tell you.”

Geoff frowned. “What can’t you tell me, Jeremy? I won’t tell anyone else if you don’t want me to.” When the shorter made no attempt to speak again, he sighed. “Do you want me to call Travis?”

“No!” Jeremy tried to hide his fear, but he could Geoff picked up on it. “Please, don’t.”

“Did Travis do this?”

“Geoff, I-”

“Did Travis fucking do this, Jeremy?” Geoff’s eyes were filled with rage. He saw Jeremy shrink back in fear, and he took a breath to calm himself. “Please, Jeremy. Let me help you. Did Travis do this to you?”

The younger looked away. “I’m so stupid. I-I should have known nothing would change.” He felt tears sting his eyes. “It’s my fault. I’m-”

Geoff enveloped Jeremy in a loose hug, being careful of his injuries. “It’s not your fault, Jer. You didn’t do anything wrong.” He rubbed the younger male’s back as he started to silently sob. “It’s going to be okay, Jer. We’re going to make sure that he doesn’t hurt you again.”

After what felt like a century, Jeremy had cried himself to sleep. Carefully, Geoff pulled himself away and walked back into the waiting room, where the other four were waiting for him.

Ryan was the first to notice the elder’s return. “What happened?”

“His piece of shit boyfriend happened,” Geoff hissed. He glanced to Michael and Gavin. “You two stay here, so he doesn’t wake up alone. Ryan, Jack, and I are going to go find Travis and make him pay for what he’s done.”

\--

“This is it.” Jack sighed and turned off the car, glancing at the small apartment building. “Do we have a plan?”

“Kill him,” Geoff snapped.

Ryan shook his head. “No, death would be too kind. We should just beat the shit out of him. Give him the same treatment he gave Jeremy. And threaten him to leave and never come back.”

“I like that idea, too.” Nodding, Geoff exited the car, the other two Gents following behind him. They reached Jeremy’s apartment door and knocked.

“What- Why are you guys here?” Travis threw the door open, nearly glaring at the trio. “And have you seen Jeremy?”

“Jeremy’s fine,” Jack said, his arms crossed. “But you won’t be.”

Travis was taken aback. “What are you-”

Geoff roared and grabbed Travis by the collar. “We know what you did, you piece of shit. And now, we’re going to do the same to you.”

“Unless you agree to leave right now, and never come near Jeremy again.” Ryan’s voice held a tone of warning. “Make your choice.”

“Jeremy isn’t worth the effort. You can have him.” Travis gripped at Geoff’s hands. “Now put me-”

The older male reared back and punched the younger in the face, sending him flying back into the apartment. “Jeremy’s worth more than you ever will be. You’re nothing.” Geoff’s blue eyes were cold as ice. “If you’re here when Jeremy comes home, we _will_ make sure you regret ever being born.” Without another word, Geoff turned on his heels and walked away, Jack and Ryan following quickly behind him.

“We should have just beaten him to a pulp,” Ryan whined.

“And if he’s still there tomorrow when Jeremy comes home, we will.” Geoff didn’t bother looking back at his boyfriends. “But Jeremy needs us right now. So let’s go.”

“Right.”


	4. Epilogue[?]

Jeremy was both terrified and relieved when he found out what happened. He had been worried that Travis wouldn’t be gone when he returned, but as he entered his apartment for the first time since he was hospitalized, Travis’ stuff was gone, and the man was nowhere to be found.

Paranoid as he was, Jeremy searched the entire apartment for any signs of Travis that remained, and though he didn’t see anything that stuck out to him, a note left on the fridge made his blood turn to ice.

_Jeremy,_

_You think you’re safe, but you’re never safe. One day, when you least expect it, I’ll come back for you. And I’ll make you pay for what you’ve done._

The note was unsigned, but Jeremy knew the handwriting. Travis threatened to come back. It had taken reassurances from his friends for him to calm down and think it through. He was bluffing, right? Surely Travis wasn’t that stupid? Jeremy couldn’t be sure but knew nothing could be done now. It was over. Jeremy had survived.

Over the next couple months, Jeremy found himself confused by his own feelings. How could he have just gotten out of a relationship but find himself falling for his five best friends? He concluded that he’d fallen out of love with Travis a long time ago, and while he knew the guys were better people then Travis could ever dream of, Jeremy was afraid. He was afraid of falling in love and getting hurt again.

The guys returned the affection he felt in their own ways. Geoff would offer him gentle touches when he was frustrated or upset. Ryan would quote nerdy things at him to get him to laugh. Jack would mother him; constantly asking him how he was feeling or if he needed anything. Gavin would be a little shit, like usual, but in a more flirtatious way. And Michael would offer to come home with him sometimes when Jeremy felt too afraid to be in his apartment alone.

Jeremy should have been expecting it when Geoff asked him to join the relationship, but he was in shock. He felt like he didn’t belong with the five of them; they were so much better than he was. “I can’t” was his response, and when they asked him why, all he could say was “I’m not good enough. I’ll never be good enough.”

The guys had stared at him sadly; of course, he felt inadequate. That was all Travis had ever made him feel.

“Jeremy,” Jack had started. “You are perfect as you are. We love you for you. I’m sorry Travis made you feel that way, but I promise, we wouldn’t ask if we didn’t want you to be with us.”

It had taken several passing moments for Jack’s words to sink in, and they brought Jeremy to tears. “I’d… I’d love to be a part of the relationship.” His heart, for the first time in a long time, felt truly warm.

Jeremy knew that his wounds wouldn’t heal for a long time. He knew that he would still have days where he would feel just as worthless as Travis tried to tell him he was. But as he stared at the loving gazes of his friends – no, boyfriends – he knew he would eventually be okay.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well, that's it for now! Maybe I'll do something else with this; who knows? ;)
> 
> I'm so sorry the epilogue sucked but work has been stressing me out and I didn't want to lose ALL of the ideas I had for it. I kept gradually forgetting what I wanted to do with this, so I started writing it on my phone.
> 
> I promise the next installment I do for this will be better! <3 Love you all! -White


End file.
